For example, let's talk about a typical installation - a woman needs to seek . This is the wrong installation. Because both sexes are absolutely equal in this regard. And if in your environment there is some girl who you really like, but at the same time for some reason says: “I need to get it,” then for sure somewhere nearby, and even in this world, and not in a parallel universe, there is some quite worthy girl who will gladly prefer you over another guy. At the same time, you, for some reason, perhaps, do not allow her to come to you.
The correct installation that you must have - I value in itself . Proceeding from it, you must prove yourself. And if someone somewhere tells you that this is not so, then you can safely stop communicating in this environment without any remorse. If you are told that you are not good enough, as a man or not cool enough, as a specialist, as an employee, as a relative, just stop talking to such people. It undermines your self-esteem and confidence. Hence the good news - you do not need a girl achieve . Need to be enough valuable to communicate with her on an equal footing. And this value is already in you.
The beauty and ringing of coins
Another popular setup is need to earn more . Yes, when a woman chooses a man, she prefers, as a rule, to the more affluent. And this attitude is broadcast everywhere in our society. This is a very convenient format, which, supposedly, should motivate you to something. And from different angles you seem to be hinted that if the ringing of coins in your pocket is barely audible, then you will not see beautiful bright women either. How to fall in love with yourself, not with your money.
But you must understand that your level of earnings is not a constant. If you are a fighter by nature, if you are ambitious and have some skills, abilities and talents, then developing them and integrating them into your life, you will soon see that earnings themselves go up. Well, the girls who refused you become older and, gradually, lose the freshness and beauty of youth. And then the situation changes. And everyone understands this. And girls - especially. Precisely because the age of their beauty is short-lived, many are trying at the current moment to sell themselves more expensive.
Therefore, the correct installation is that people come together and build relationships not on the foundation of material wealth, but on mutual interest, shared goals, sexual attraction and some kind of social contract . Therefore, look for a girl with whom you will have all of the above and then the strength of your relationship will be fastened not by the number of zeros after the number in the bank account, but by shared experiences, future prospects and valuable time spent together and you will not be wondering how to behave with the girl who is next to you.
Man or invisible
Another gift from childhood - installation I do not want to be intrusive. If you think that acquaintance in a restaurant, cafe, club, on the street, in public transport is an obsessive behavior, then immediately start digging from afar. When you limit yourself, not wanting to disturb someone else's comfort, it comes from your low self-esteem, which you were lowered in childhood. And this was done in order to make it easier to control you and to control you - in which corner they placed you, in that they took you away. Obviously, a person with such an attitude will most likely never achieve anything outstanding, because the world is a competitive, aggressive environment in which you must be able to take your own. Here they attach themselves and run only for those who are already on their way. How to behave with a girl? Be confident in yourself!
The second derivative of the wording I do not want to be intrusive – I do not want to stand out . That is why many men try to dissolve as much as possible into the crowd of their own kind, choosing clothes of gray, dark blue and black.
At the same time, pay attention to the girls. Even when they say that they do not like obsessive and eye-catching men, they themselves try to dress as beautifully and attractively as possible, because it is customary. It’s normal for girls to look bright, and she easily allows herself to be unobtrusive when she wants. Therefore, believe me, you can come up and chat with any girl and you will never seem intrusive, even communicating from a position from above, if you are polite, friendly and considerate.
What is the correct installation in this case? I know what I want, and persistently achieve my goal . Persistence and obsession are not the same thing, although it sounds like it. Persistence means that you can offer a person several times to do what you need, or even make you do what you need. It comes from a position of strength, and strong people are loved. Installation not be intrusive - this is the installation of a weak person, installation to be persistent - strong.
How to behave with a girl
It is generally accepted that there are rules or patterns in how to behave properly with a girl. The popularity of this myth is due to the great desire of young guys to get ready-made instructions that lead to good relationships, mutual sympathy and even some moments of influence on the girl’s behavior. Of course, there is no single and only correct way of behavior, and such a conclusion comes to the person only with a huge number of mistakes or unsuccessful attempts. An increased level of anxiety and a slight decrease in self-esteem can provoke a desire to find guarantees of success.
There are no unambiguous recommendations on how to behave with a girl, because for each situation, not only your own special style of communication is suitable, but also words and topics, given the two personalities encountered for interaction. However, there are some classic and general areas, taking into account which will help to set up relations in the necessary way, as well as improve the level of understanding and sympathy in existing ones.
Tips for guys
Advice on behavior will have fairly general recommendations, but each guy will be able to adapt them to their own situation, temperament, as well as relationships that cause difficulties. Initially, you need to work on your own positioning and presentation - the primary self-presentation, and not a sleek appearance.
Girls prefer confident, slightly cold-blooded men, striving for achievements and having their own clear-cut position on each issue. It’s difficult to play such qualities, and it turns out to be a short period of time, and then the girl encounters reality and stops communicating. Therefore, it is necessary to spend time, look inside, evaluate your value and semantic attitudes, reflect on a lot of things and understand your attitude towards them, so that in a situation of a dialogue not to hide behind someone else's opinion.
It is necessary to discard the main desire - to be good and try to please. People without flaws are boring, the right boys get bored, and the desire to impress only brings tension, both to the guy and to the whole dialogue. Therefore, a pleasant bonus that allows you to build harmonious relationships is the freedom from the need to strain. In fact, the main task is to ensure that you feel comfortable communicating and not be afraid to show qualities or some features that are usually recognized as flaws. How you will ensure a comfortable state when communicating depends on personal preferences - you can choose a familiar environment or work out a meeting with a psychologist, or you can think through a meeting to the details or do soothing breathing exercises before going out.
So that the girl generally understands with whom she communicates, what you need, how similar and what is happening now between you, you need to be able to talk about yourself. This does not mean constant self-praise and retelling of the biography, but the ability to correctly convey your desires and feelings about what is happening. We are all looking for a response from other people to our external manifestations, trying to understand what is possible and what is not, to establish the internal boundaries of interaction. Therefore, there is a constant urgent need to talk about desires and honestly show dissatisfaction with some manifestations of a girl. Perhaps you will be the first to comment on the behavior of deliberate demonstrativeness, the purpose of which is to obtain a ban-concern to behave this way.
Guys should remember the only win-win pattern - the main thing in the manifestation of a non-verbal. Therefore, you can not especially listen to the text regarding any event or your person, but focus on further conclusions on the non-verbal manifestations of interest or rejection. When she refuses to go to the cinema, but smiles broadly - do not stop trying to invite somewhere else or just take tickets and stop by her. If she says that this joke is vulgar and insulting, but her eyes lit up, then this devil is present in her character. When a girl tries to show indifference, talking with everyone except you, but her body is turned exactly in your direction - this is a game to attract attention. A lot of such examples can be given, and the point is that women's decisions and actions are controlled by emotions, which can be hidden by text, but not by the body.
Do not forget about the classics - a neat appearance, cultural appeal, a demonstration of respect, education, erudition. Any charisma can be nullified by dirt under the nails or a message with nine errors. Girls are rather scrupulous in such matters and not because a cleanly ironed shirt is more important than the fact that you can kill a dragon for her, just the female world is based on slightly different values, given that you can make a better impression and avoid many scandals.
How to behave when meeting
The tension in communication causes the first meeting or the first minutes of the meeting. It is not clear what to talk about, the scan has not passed, in what mood the interlocutor is and what can be expected, the guy does not know whether the girl shows sympathy, as well as many other factors that create a feeling of complete unknown. The cheat sheet of behavior during a meeting comes down to simple actions that help to establish a real emotional contact so that the acquaintance is successful, and the previously agreed meeting began pleasantly.
You should pay attention to the greeting, including minimal physical contact. You can kiss a girl's hand or just shake it, peck on the cheek or hug - it depends on the norms and conditional proximity. But the first touch of minutes is necessary to indicate one’s position. If you have a previously unfamiliar girl, then invite her to chat, discuss some issue or take an interest in her opinion, but in no case talk about acquaintance as a goal - girls do not like to feel like an exhibit or trophy, so they abruptly stop similar moments. If you are having a conversation on an interesting topic, then you may not even ask for the name of a stranger - it will be safe for her.
Build the whole conversation at a meeting with a dominant and leading position, while avoiding dictatorship. You need to gently guide the girl, since it is unlikely that she has a clear plan where you will go, what you will do and what topics are relevant to discuss - she will wait for the initiative from the man. Of course, you need to pay attention and respect to her personal space, so have a few options, suggesting a choice or ask about the option of spending time.
In general, try to demonstrate confidence, and the presence of several plans for the development of the situation will help. Do not try to guess her mood and adapt to it, it is better to ask directly. Also state your desires and preferences.
A separate item is to highlight compliments and various signs of attention. They are pleasant to any woman, but must be adequate to the situation and sound sincere. Erased phrases, prepared cliches, flowers bought in the next stall, with which all the girls go on this street - a terrible bad manners. Better humor with notes of sarcasm about her being late due to preening than memorized phrases. Insincerity at a meeting creates a high level of tension for all subsequent communication, so maintain your comfort and take care of the girl's condition. A direct recognition of the desire to spend this evening in her pleasant company is a more pleasant compliment than quotes that smell like mothballs, and besides, truth cannot be felt behind it.
Prepare for a meeting as if meeting a stranger from online space or meeting your own bride from work. Create a small present, calculate the most pleasant or short route, take coffee or an umbrella along the way for it. You can draw a cool poster, uplifting or pick up heavy bags - the main thing is to show that you were waiting for this meeting and somehow prepared, thinking about the girl.
How to behave with a stranger girl
Most often, difficulties arise in men who do not know the rules of conduct when meeting a girl. In this case, it is extremely important to have a positive impression on the stranger in order to encourage further communication. You can meet a lady you like in the most inappropriate places, for example, in a subway or a noisy restaurant filled with visitors, where in a hurry and bustle you need to take the first step without missing a beautiful stranger.
Seeing a girl you like, a man needs a few simple rules on how to behave:
- Finding a moment to meet. You can wait until she goes outside to breathe fresh air, in the club you can just invite her to a dance, get out at her stop in the subway and speak when the opportunity arises.
- Calm and confident behavior. Despite the inner excitement, a man needs to remain calm and confident, but without going too far.
- Originality in moderation. Not all girls show understanding if a man uses a creative approach and phrases, like "Does your mom need a son-in-law?" Much more appropriate would be a simple conversation, introducing yourself and the proposal to meet in tandem with compliments.
- An act for her. You can offer a girl help, for example, bring a bag, order dessert for her table, give way to the subway, etc.
- Meeting invitation. If the situation is comfortable and the girl is in no hurry, you can invite her to go to a nearby cafe for a cup of coffee. Slow and delaying a date can lead to the fact that a man will simply not have such a second chance.
If the girl gave her phone number at the meeting, the man needs to accurately indicate the time of the call and fulfill the promise. If the attempts were unsuccessful, the girl gave a clear refusal to get acquainted, it is important to maintain self-control, not to show emotions of frustration. It is better to make an effort to get to know each other, even if they will be inconclusive, rather than inactive and sorry.
How to behave, on a first date with a girl?
Next, a man needs to understand for himself a few basic rules on how to behave with a girl after meeting, if she agreed to a first date. It is here that the prospect of relations will be determined, since most often after the first date the girl understands whether she needs a man, and the man leaves the most important first impression about himself. Psychologists advise to pay attention to several points:
- It is important to choose the right place for a meeting so that you can have a comfortable time and chat without obstacles. You can clarify the girl’s preferences when communicating, but do not forget about your features. For example, if a man is afraid of rides, he will not be able to behave with dignity in such a place.
- A man needs to help the girl in every possible way to get rid of embarrassment and excitement, you can use a sense of humor, say a few compliments about her appearance. It is important to conduct topics of conversation in which she will understand, which means she can support the conversation.
- It is important to behave confidently and calmly, without showing inner excitement. You can make a list of topics for yourself in which both he and his companion will be competent.
- If the thread of the conversation is suddenly lost, and the man cannot find a new topic, you can transfer the conversation to it, being interested in her life, hobbies, occupation, etc. At the same time, it is better not to touch on some personal topics at the first meeting, be it past relationships or family matters.
- It is important to show your interest in the girl, to be gallant and polite, without using rude words, sarcasm and excessive familiarity. The girl will appreciate the naturalness, smile and kindness of a man.
Такие же правила поведения можно использовать с девушкой другом, если мужчина стремится ей понравиться и перевести формат отношений с дружбы в романтику. При встрече лучше преподнести небольшой презент, чтобы показать щедрость души и серьезность намерений к девушке. Это могут быть цветы, сладости, которые так любят девушки, небольшой сувенир, главное, чтобы подарок был недорогим, иначе девушка сочтет поступок хвастовством.
What should be the talk about?
Many men do not take such a responsible approach to the question of what to talk about with a girl on a first date that they often encounter embarrassment and communication difficulties. In fact, psychologists advise in advance to think over a list of neutral topics that would be interesting to both, without introducing anyone into an impasse with awkward pauses. The main topics in which both are competent can be as follows:
- favorite films and music, on the basis of this information you can plan new dates (going to the cinema or to a concert),
- hobbies of men, thanks to which you can show your good sides,
- hobbies girls, on the basis of this information you can also come up with options for new meetings,
- occupation of man and girl,
- humor and funny stories from childhood that touch girls and make communication easy.
If a man feels a reciprocal interest on the part of the girl, is confident in establishing contact with her, you can talk about love topics, but only superficially. The girl can be asked her views on family life, what kind of man she wants to see next to her, whether she loves romance, etc.
How to behave with your girlfriend so as not to lose her
Many men who are already in a relationship during times of crisis and chill in a pair ask questions such as “how to behave with a girl to be drawn to me” or “how to behave with a girl to not lose her”. Such excitement is approved by leading psychologists, offering several ways to build relationships, namely:
- taking care even in the smallest details,
- maintaining passion in the intimate sphere,
- organization of dates and romantic surprises to combat everyday life,
- manifestation of affection and tenderness, despite masculinity and brutality,
- compliment regularly
- interest in her affairs, dreams and hobbies,
- building relationships with her parents and friends,
- the ability to listen is an important condition, even if the topics of her conversation are far from masculine,
- spending time together and doing things together
- truthfulness even in the smallest details
- excessive criticism in her direction will be perceived as a manifestation of dislike.
Any manifestations of aggression in her direction, humiliation and insults will lead to the end of the relationship. Even if a girl is wrong at some point, a man always needs to remain a gentleman, maintaining his composure.
How to behave with any girl
Many men are so immersed in the advice of experts on how to behave with their girlfriend, with a younger girl, with a stranger, with their wife or girlfriend, that they forget about contraindications and prohibited practices. At the same time, psychologists especially emphasize which men do not like girls, namely:
- a man with bad habits
- immoral type.
It is contraindicated for a man to use rudeness, swearing, vulgarity, aggression and cruelty aside a girl. Also, the girl will be turned away from the boyfriend by his excessive boasting, provocative behavior and neglect of her. You should not use one model of behavior with all the girls, because due to different characters and temperaments this number can go through with one lady, and it will fail tremendously with the other.
There is no definite and clearly formulated recipe for how a man needs to behave with a girl so that she is afraid of losing you. It is much easier to build relationships with the one you like, but with a stranger you need to strictly follow the rules of conduct from specialists in order to make a positive impression on her. In any case, women love calm and confident men who show interest, care and attention towards them.
When a girl is waiting for a tram
Installation - girls do not like to have sex. The idea that girls are exceptionally gentle creatures and think about the spiritual, at the moment when the guys think about the bodily, is not true. This attitude comes from repressed sexuality. And although it is encouraged in our society when a girl looks sexy, knows how to skillfully flirt and be attractive to men, the men themselves are broadcast a completely different thing - be a gentleman and not a word about sex. In fact, this means something like this - put on a mask, pretend that you are asexual and have nothing and nothing like that on your mind and never have.
Those who flirt with gentlemen run the risk of never learning that the girls themselves constantly complain that a normal man is "extinct" - one who knows how to be persistent, beautifully seduce and seduce, be tempted in bed and show her real emotions revealing all the secrets of an adult and interesting life.
By the way, it happened evolutionarily that in girls the biological program is associated with procreation, and therefore with sexuality, and this program is very dominant. That is why girls are able to communicate better, better to flirt, look better, and, of course, they want to communicate with sexually attractive, confident and knowing how to behave with a girl men. Therefore, the correct installation is girls like to receive attention from men, including sexual . Remember that along with confidence, good manners and tact are on your side.
Installation women need to please - the case when the road was paved with good intentions not to the sea coast, but to the cottage to her mother, where you weed weeds and plant potatoes for half your weekend. Also, as a man, you solve all her problems, including minor ones. You make superfluous for the family budget, but her desired purchases, and you become dependent on her whims, forgetting about your own needs.
Women need to please - the installation of a weak person who was raised by same-sex marriage - mother and grandmother, whom no one taught to raise boys. The fact is that many parents raise sons for themselves. As a result, by adulthood, the child has a whole arsenal of error-free manipulations that force a person to do what he does not want, to please his mother, grandmother and others. Hence, some guys at the firmware level have the wording that if a woman sneezed, then you must definitely run for a handkerchief. And to solve even those of her problems, which she did not ask.
Another approach is when you yourself choose what you want to do. And you do for your beloved girl, only what you want yourself. And the separation here is very simple. In one case, this is care, and in the other, custody.
Guardianship is excessive attention even to minor problems, the laying on of hyperresponsibility, which is called care.
And the right care is when you are attentive to your girlfriend, notice her strengths and help her develop these aspects. Care - when you help her become a stronger and more self-confident person, you teach her how to solve her problems on her own, but you always provide reliable rear and support. This is the answer, how to behave with a girl. And then your relationship becomes equivalent when two mature personalities exist together as psychologically and physically equivalent partners.
Summing up, I’ll say that it’s impossible to change one’s settings simply by showing a strong-willed effort after reading this article. Settings change after you observe them yourself and note how other settings begin to benefit you and the girls like it.
The main words that you must learn:
Relations are built on mutual interest, shared goals and sexual desire, rather than income.
I know what I want and I am persistent in achieving goals .
Girls like to receive attention from men, including sexual.
Relations can be equivalent.
And all this can happen if you do only what you want, and not what you were told. We hope that we answered your question how to behave with a girl. And how not to give in to manipulations - you can read here. Good luck to you!